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All I Want for Christmas….


 

The Christmas Season is here.  That brings on the perpetual wish lists.  Since I have five kids, this could bring on a tad bit of stress.  All these lists.  So many wishes, so little money.  I have tried to teach my kids to prioritize and realize I actually do NOT have a money tree in the backyard.  Be conservative.

Apparently, they’ve been listening pretty well. Yea, right.

For example, the baby boy……he has trouble thinking of something he wants.  A new football.  A new football jersey or three.  A remote control car.  A snare drum.  That will do it.  Of course, as time goes on, he thinks of other random things he wants, too.  But he doesn’t add them to the official list.  It’s on the Santa list.  Cause that won’t cost mom money.  Humph.

English: A snare drum. Español: una caja orque...

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Then there is the next kiddo in line…. He realizes he needs to be conservative, but he has a massive list.  You know just in case Santa is actually real.  In that case, mom’s lack of a money tree shouldn’t matter and the sky is the limit.  Smart kid right there.  I’m just not sure exactly how to go about bursting that bubble of optimism. His list includes…. a REAL piano, interactive Toy Story toys (that range from $45-60 EACH).  He only wants the Lotso Bear, Rex, Bullseye (one of the most rare), and Hamm.  Then there is a list of CDs, Comic Books, and even a few movies thrown in.  As I had my head hanging between my knees trying to come out of my state of hyperventilating, he says, “Mom, I don’t want to be any trouble.  So, take the piano off my list.  I can practice at Grandma’s.  I can do without it.”  The piano was his number one request.   Most desired.  Hmmm…..either he’s brilliant and securing the score by making me think he is willing to sacrifice, or he really IS learning.  Either way.  The piano is his.  Geeeezzzz……

Next comes the real piece of work…..Cam.  He is the classic middle child.  He keeps our life interesting.  When I don’t need to pull my hair out from his antics, I am completely entertained.  But his Christmas list simply sends me into a state of panic.  I only need to win the lotto to even come close.

“I’ve been listening, Mom.  I don’t actually expect you to get me all of these things.  I just want you to have plenty of ideas and if you happen to hit really good sales, you will have plenty to choose from.  And then Santa can pick up some of what’s left.  It’s the dream list, mom.  The ultimate.  I know I’m not gonna get it all.  You always tell me you get more when you expect more.  High expectations yield high results.”

Ouch.  Gotta love it when your own words come back to bite you in the you know what.

So, his list…..it’s color coded.  Each color represents the amount of gotta have it.  For example, items in red = can’t live without; items in green = really, really want;  items in black = take it or leave it, but I really want to take it. His list is three hand-written pages.  Seriously.  For real.

Thanks, Cam.  Now, when I get only a fraction of your list, I can feel like a big fat Santa failure.  But hey, you don’t actually expect to get it all, right?????

By the time I finished recovering from the presenting of these lists, I decided the two oldest boys were grown.  They are 19 and 20.  Out of the house.  In college.  Santa was over for them.  They better choose and choose wisely.  I wanted a list, but a small one.  Of course, that went over like a lead balloon. I believe the requests were a new car, pay for my housing for spring semester, and cash, cash, and more cash.  Oh and lots of little presents.

I literally looked at them and wondered who had taken over their bodies.  Where were the children I raised??

But that’s when it happened.  I’m not sure if it was a ploy to remind me of the fact that I would want goodies for Christmas, or a sincere request, but they asked me what I wanted for Christmas.  They even asked for a list.  Woohoo!!!!!!!  Paybacks can be sweet!!!!

I couldn’t help myself.  I needed a good laugh.  So, I made the little turkeys a list.  Bahahahahaaaa…… And it looks something like this…

All I want for Christmas is………..

♥  A new Kitchen-Aid mixer.  If you really shop the sales, you can find one for a little over $200.

♥ An iPad.  Any kind acceptable.

♥ The new iPhone 4S.  They are sooooo cool!

♥ Because I don’t want to overload you TOO much, that’s all.  Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.  I can’t wait!!! 

The look on their little faces was priceless.  They quickly informed me, ,”We don’t have that kind of money.   There is NO way, we can afford any of those things….. even if we pool together.  You know this!”

I quickly explained I knew EXACTLY how they felt.

And there it was.  Lesson learned.  They began dropping things off their lists like crazy.  They narrowed their lists down to what they really want.  They are even shopping thrift stores for gifts for each other and making some homemade gifts.  They are paying attention to prices.

Score one for Mom!

Now, I just need to take up donations.  After all, Santa COULD bring me all of the things on MY list!  😉

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by on November 30, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Happy Dancing, Thankfulness, and Retail Therapy


I have been absent from blogging for several days.  My life has been extremely stressful for the past couple of weeks.  But things are looking up.  Well, sort of.  I’m going to get the rare opportunity to escape the reality of life’s stress and have my very own little play party.  Seriously.  At risk of turning you completely green with envy, I’m gonna let you in on my exciting week to come.

♥  Tomorrow my baby boys will be home.  All of them.  All five.  In one nest.  At one time.  The last time that happened was Halloween.  Yes, I realize that was only a few weeks ago, but it feels like  FOR.EV.AH.  I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve.  I am slightly excited.  Somebody might better remind me of that tomorrow when I’m in the middle of cooking for my clan!  It takes a lot to feed these turkeys. =D

 

♥  Wednesday morning we will pull out and head for the Big D.  We will be staying a few days with my aunt and uncle who are the ultimate hosts.  They have one of those houses that is beautiful, scarily clean, yet comfy.  I love going there.  I can forget the worries of housework, because somehow their house is always clean.  No matter how many people they have over.  It’s weird how that happens.   Plus, she is cooking Thanksgiving dinner for us.  All we were asked to bring is drinks for our family.  A whole, entire, Thanksgiving meal that I don’t have to cook.  Woohooooo!!!   I will be happy dancing all the way to Dallas!

♥  So, let’s see.  We are up to Thursday, Thanksgiving Day.  It’s Cowboy time ba—beee!  We are ALL loading up and heading out the Dallas Cowboy football game.  It will be my first NFL football game.  We are even gonna do a little low-key tailgating.  Another first.  I think I will add that to my Pushing Up Daisies List, just so I can mark it off.   I just might be happy dancing in my sleep!

 

♥  And, then, it’s the Big Kahuna……..the whole enchilada…….the be all, end all, of the ultimate Thansgiving holiday……..Black Friday!! Sales start at 10pm.  I will be there with my game face on!  And, on top of the ultimate shopping as a contact sport experience, the hubby will be taking the kids back home.  So I will also finish the trip with a kid-free night.  Retail therapy and girl time!!   Woop!  Woop!

And as if that’s not enough to make you roll your eyes and wanna slap me silly………all my Christmas decorations are up and running.  Lights twinkling.  Christmas music playing.  The kids advent calendar is almost finished and ready for lift-off.  I will come home ready to wrap gifts and enjoy the Christmas season.

Have I ever told you quitting my job and becoming a stay-at-home mom was the absolute best thing I ever did?  Well, it was and I’m telling you now.  I am completely blessed and overwhelmed by the love and grace of my heavenly Father.  I’m just hard-headed enough to fight tooth and nail.  I was just certain we couldn’t financially make it one one income.  I’m living proof that if you will follow God’s calling on your life, joy and contentment will find their way to you.  I am so blessed to have Him directing my life.  Him loving me through my hard-headed ways.  Him pushing until I surrendered.  So this week, although I might be MIA from the blogging world (I’m gonna try, but can’t make any promises.), I will be praising God for the many blessings in my life.  Getting recharged.  Refreshed.  And I will for sure be having loads of FUN!!!

And for all of this, I’m truly thankful.

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by on November 21, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Randomness………Really.


Today has been some kinda day!  Busy every moment.  Yes, EVERY moment.  It has been chaotic!   Til now.  Yay!

Since I used up all my emotional energy, my thinking cap is burnt out, and I’m just plain ole tired, I decided to bless you with a random list!

Druuummmmmm roll, puh-leeeze!!

♥  Tonight was our church Thanksgiving meal.  Food was everywhere.  Seriously.  Tons. of. food.  But you know what was the absolute BEST thing about it??  My boys telling me (on the way home), “I just didn’t like anything they had except the dumplings, cobbler, and acorn cookie thingies.”  What’s the big deal about that??  Momma made all of those things!!  And believe me, we have some master cooks in our church.  So that’s a HUGE compliment!  Momma is rocking the kitchen….. and by Momma, I mean ME.  =D

♥  Speaking of acorn cookie thingies….. I made two things I found on Pinterest.  Yessirreee, Bob.  I made the acorn thingies AND pilgrim hats.  I was really hoping to get a pic, but since we were running last minute finishing them, I didn’t.  And they were all gone after the dinner.  Yay!

Pic from Pinterest…….but mine were adorable, too!

♥  I realize today I’m using the word YAY a bit too much.  But, it just really reflects my mood.  And since my ADHD is in overdrive, I just don’t want to try to come up with anything else.  At the risk of sounding redundant….YAY!

♥  I have got to get off my patooty and find my battery charger for my camera.  For some reason, I can never keep up with that thing.  Oh, wait, the reason is I’m totally scatterbrained.  Yep, that’s it.  Couldn’t keep up with my rear if it wasn’t attached at the hip.

♥  Pandas are seriously adorable creatures.  I have never seen one in real life.  It would probably be disappointing since their white fur would probably be filthy.  But they are still beautiful animals.  But my favorite are still flamingos.

♥  I don’t really watch the news much anymore.  It’s WAY depressing.  But my mom was telling me about this old pervert coach from Penn State who has been abusing young boys for YEARS.  So, I’ve just gotta say, every staff member and friend that knew about this crap and did nothing should be sent up the river with him.  Oh, and telling someone who did nothing is not enough.  You keep telling till someone does something.  Everyone of them………up the river.

♥  Some people crack me up.  Since this month is Thanksgiving, Facebook is over-run with thankful posts.  And yes, I’m posting them too.  Don’t judge.  It’s not a bad thing.  But what cracks me up are people who actually post the same thing (with different wording) almost every day.  Some people have such tunnel vision that all they can see is themselves.  So they just keep saying the same things over and over and over.  Oh, oh….and how about the “I’m thankful for my dad, sis, bro, mom, dog, son, daughter, house, job, and car.  That will do for the first half of the month.”  Seriously?  Are you really thankful?

Image representing Facebook as depicted in Cru...

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♥  And then there’s THOSE  OTHER people.  You know, the ones who apparently have nothing better to do than sit around count how many times someone has posted the same thankful post.  And then they have the nerve to rate someone’s thankful heart just based on a stupid FB post.  Geeeeeeezzzzz, S.O.M.E.O.N.E. needs a life!

♥  Do pajamas really have to match?  I mean, does it really matter if my PJ pants and my top match?  When does it matter?  When I have company over?  When I go visit someone else?  Or never?  Really?  Is it important?

♥  And now my pet word must be really.  Just in case you didn’t notice.

♥  Hurley on Lost just needs to shave.  I don’t care if you’re stuck on a deserted island.  Just shave.  Dude, it’s really gross.  And hey, there was all kinds of junk in the wreckage.  Surely you can find something to shave with.  Jin is ALWAYS clean shaven.

 

 

 

 

 

Hurley

 

 

Jin…like I said, ALWAYS clean shaven!

 

 

 

♥  Have I told you I get to go to the Dallas Cowboy football game on Thanksgiving Day?  Yep, I’m just that cool.  Gonna tailgate and everything!  Plus, the Black Friday sales start at 10pm Thanksgiving night.  Just makes me so excited I’m giddy.  I get butterflies just thinking about it.  Next week is gonna be good week.

 

♥  Speaking of Black Friday…….I better go browse the ads.  They are already online and I’ve taken a peek at them, but I need to start making a plan of attack list.  I would go into detail, but that’s definitely  for another post.  Besides, all I can think about now is….

sh-op-ping!!!!!!!!!

So off I go!!!!!!!

Later Gator!!

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by on November 16, 2011 in Randomocity

 

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Time to Shop! Thanks, Dr. Oz!


I don’t have cable.

When I decided to resign from my teaching position, we trimmed the extras.  We had to weigh our priorities.  Internet won.  Cable lost.  We traded the hundred dollar a month cable bill for twenty bucks a month for Netflix.  I have yet to be sorry.  But that also means I don’t get to watch a lot of shows most others do.

Today, as I’m sitting in the hotel, I flipped on the TV.  I just happened to stop at the Dr. Oz show.  I have never watched his show or his appearances on Oprah.  So I had absolutely no idea what to expect.

I have to be honest.  I struggle with weight issues and have all my life.  I don’ t expect that struggle to ever end.  I am currently trying to slowly make lifestyle changes in the hope that I will gradually lose some weight and gain healthier eating habits.  I’ve tried to cut most sugar from my diet (most days) and I’m working on portion control.

When I saw this episode was about dieting, I thought I would check out what the Doc had to say.  Maybe I would pick up some good tips.

This is what I learned:

  • Taking a bath in seaweed helps reduce the visibility of cellulite.  I believe he said 5 sheets of seaweed in your bath once a week.    Well, that brings to mind a question or two…..Exactly where am I supposed to find sheets of seaweed?  Really, do you expect me to spend my money on seaweed just so you can’t see my cellulite as well?  Of course, if you are covered in seaweed it only makes sense that people won’t see your cellulite.  This man is b.r.i.l.l.i.a.n.t!

  • Taking a bath in beer once a week reduces acne.  Which causes me to wonder if I should submerge my face and neck under water.  After all, that’s where I have acne issues…..along with most of the population.  If so, how long do I need to stay under the beer water to get the desired effect?  I think I have a snorkel mask somewhere…..guess I could use that to get air for breathing.  But, hey, it will be worth it if it gives me one less zit.

 

  • Substituting pickles for potato chips or French fries one time a week will save tons of calories.  If you continue this for one year, you should lose three pounds.  And it only takes a whole year!  Yay!  But, what about the water weight gain from eating pickles?  They make me swell up like a balloon.   Surely the three pounds you finally lost by the end of the year isn’t the water gain you get from eating the stinking pickles in the first place….right??

I'm sure this tastes mucho better than potato chips or FF anyway. Pshhh....

 

  • Gotta big butt?  You need a low-fat diet.  Although butt and hip fat are the least likely of the evil fats to cause heart attacks.  Is that saying not to worry about my big butt?  By the way, the best way to fight a big butt is by doing curtsies.  True story.

 

  • Gotta big belly and a fat back?  You need a low carb diet.  That means no sugar, no breads, no grains.  What joy fills my soul to hear those not-so-sweet words.  This fat is also harder to lose and more dangerous for your health to carry around. You also need metabolic resistance training to drop the jelly belly.  But hey, knowing how hard it is to lose and that I have to give up anything good to eat gives me real hope and encouragement to tackle the jelly belly.  Thanks.

 

  • What about those of us who have issues with ALL of the above?  No worries, Dr. Oz gives you tips on faking it.  Just dress to hide the shame and it will all be alright.  If you’re not sure how to do that, check out his webpage.

Me?  I’m not a quitter.  So, I guess I’ll learn to like pickles, dig out that snorkel mask, make a trip to the beach (to stock up on seaweed),…..and hit the stores.  I mean…… really, I never thought about hiding the fat!   That’s genius!  I wonder if I can find clothes in the plus size department that will hide it well enough for me to finally get that bikini?  Stay posted.  I’ll try to post pics.  Until then, I’m off to the mall.

 

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Posted by on October 27, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Killa is Back!


She's sweet and sassy..... But don't let that fool you. There's a Killa inside!!

“Just do what we asked.  We don’t want to HEAR YOUR MOUTH!!”

Killa is back.

My mom and I had a rough day today.  She has had a horrible year.  She lost her husband, my step-dad, suddenly in an accident less than a year ago.   She just received the OSHA report detailing his death.

Like I said, horrible day.  But we decided to make the best of it and get away for the afternoon.  Forget our troubles.  And it was working pretty well.  Sort of.

We went to Sam’s Club to get groceries.  We unloaded our loot onto the checkout conveyor belt and I handed the checker my club card.  She informed me that my card was expired and it would be $40 to update my membership.  Mom said her card had almost expired too, she would split the cost, and she could be the second cardholder on my membership.  The checker said that would work.  Just go to the customer service counter after checking out and they would take care of it.  Problem averted.

Bahahahaaaa….. YEA.  RIGHT.

Groceries

We head over to the customer service center after buying $150 worth of groceries.  The little girl at the counter asked us if we lived together.  Our response, of course, was no.  She then told me she couldn’t put Mom on my membership unless we lived together.  And she didn’t just tell us this politely or even apologetically.

She apparently thought she was the Membership Princess of Sam’s Club.

I think she has a throne somewhere (probably in the bathroom) and she uses her little scanning wand to cast people out of membership eligibility with a smug smile and a MUAHAHAHAA…..  It was obvious this is a job she enjoys.

I was sure she just didn’t understand.  I mean, the girl at the check-out told us it was no problem.  They would fix us right up.  So I did my best to explain this to the Princess. Her response was for me to point out who told me such a thing.  I suddenly felt protective of this poor cashier who was so kind to us.

I wouldn’t dare rat her out!

I let the Membership Princess know I would not be tattling on anyone.  She flipped her little head around and told me she was not giving us an extra card.  I tried explaining we had been doing this for 20 years and never has anyone said a word to us about it.

NOPE, Princess wasn’t having it.  She only became more and more smug.

That’s when the switch went off for me.  I threw my hands up and said, “Well, just give me a full refund on every bit of it.”

During all this tit for tat and trying to get this little heifer, um, I mean Princess,  to understand this had to just be a misunderstanding, my mom began to have steam coming from her ears.  Princess then began to start again with the “We don’t do that, blah, blah, blah…..”

And that’s when it happened.  My mom snapped.

Killa was in the building.

“Just do what we asked.  We don’t want to HEAR YOUR MOUTH!!”

Finally the girl hushed.  I thought Killa was gonna come unleashed.  I was as nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof.  I have seen Killa in action.  I know she is afraid of nothing.  Princess better be afraid.

As she begins to scan items for the refund, one item doesn’t scan.  Princess pops off to the other girl (Who is also doing her best to be nice and keep Killa at bay.), “They probably didn’t pay for it.”

Really?  Did Princess REALLY believe we were trying to smuggle a box of Moo Moos out the door, but were stupid enough to ask for a refund of stolen items??  Really?

I think that’s when the growling started.  I thought I even saw some foaming around the corners of her mouth.  I KNOW steam was boiling from her ears.

Killa is ready to charge.

Grabbing onto her arm, I held on for dear life, trying to keep her at bay.  I just knew our next stop might be the Angelina County Jail.

Finally, the total comes up.  $10 less than what I actually paid.  Just about that time, I was telling nice girl (who had the deer in the headlights look of fear going on) I paid $150 and I was gonna get $150 refunded…..nice girl was telling Princess to rescan that item that didn’t scan earlier…..Princess was wanting to jump on us like we were trying to steal that stinking box of Moo Moos……and Killa snapped…….”Did you HEAR me??  We don’t want to HEAR your MOUTH!”

I tell you what.  Words do not do justice to the relief I felt when that item finally beeped, princess walked back around to the other side of the counter, and Killa and I were able to walk away.   Empty handed.  A good hour of our time wasted.

We spent the next hour laughing our tails off about Killa making another appearance.

Killa is my hero.

She has the courage and bravery to stand up to rude people who are being PAID to wait on us.  I can’t tell you how many rude cashiers I have had, but it’s a LOT.   Of course, I rarely and almost NEVER, say a thing.  I don’t complain…well, at least not to the culprit.  Instead, I storm around all evening, my attitude poisoned by said rude checker.   I’m a wimp.  People like me are why establishments continue to have rude employees…. because we don’t complain.

So, Killa is my hero.

She kicks into action.

Takes no prisoners.

No holds barred.

When the going gets tough, she gets tougher.

I would love to be her trusty sidekick.  I guess a girl can dream, right??

Have YOU ever had a horrible experience with customer service? 

Are you a Killa or are you a peacemaker? 

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Posted by on October 21, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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