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Monday ~ Funday!

Monday ~ Funday!

Yay for Monday!

I know.  Crazy, right??

But after having a less than best weekend, I welcome Monday with open arms.  I welcome the mundane everyday.  The routine.  The stability that it brings.  I reached my maximum stress potential before Monday ever arrived, so even when it means school work, laundry, and housework……  Yay for Monday!

In fact, I am so excited about some normalcy, I decided to share.  Yay for you!  I know you are excited.  Well, if you’re still reading.  Anyway, I have a busy day ahead.  It SHOULD look something like this………

I don’t think I’ve shared anything concerning our small family farm.  Well, it’s really more my hubby and my father-in-love’s farm, but we reap the benefits.  We have 7 goats, about 50 chickens, 10 cats, 2 dogs, and 7 cows.  We go through cycles with the chickens, so we are just now getting eggs again.

That means I’m overloaded with fresh, yummy eggs…..so you guessed it.  Omelettes are what’s for breakfast around here.  Today’s omelette was a conglomeration of ingredients we all like.  I threw them all together and it turned out great.  The kids were bickering over seconds.   It consisted of ham, onions, red and green bell peppers, mushrooms, cheese, and spinach….and of course, lots of eggs!  Eat with salsa for a splash of spice.  YUM!

While the kids work on schoolwork, I have a Christmas hat to finish knitting on the loom.  My 11-year-old started it, but I need the loom back…..and he is S.L.O.W…..and he has lost interest.  So, he wants me to finish it for him…because I’m ‘speedy quick’ at it anyway.  I think he’s just trying to get me to do his dirty work for him.  No, I’m sure of it.  It’s supposed to be a homemade Christmas gift for his dad.  And since I can’t wait to see the hubster wearing a red, green, and white toboggan all over God’s creation, I am more than happy to help him out.

Baby boy needs more time for playing Beanie Baby Football anyway.

Yes, I said Beanie Baby Football.  This weekend, we hit the Beanie Baby jackpot on our yard sale expedition.  Twenty five cents got us a practically brand new Ty Beanie Baby….tags and all.  I think we bought them out.   Don’t get me wrong, we are in no way collectors.  My boys (puppy included) LOVE to play with them.  They have now invented Beanie Baby Football.  I don’t know how it works or understand the game, but it keeps them busy for hours.

Lastly, because Mondays are usually long, torturous days….and we’ve had enough of those types of days to last for a while…..I decided today would be perfect for decorating the Christmas tree.  Yes, I know.  Thanksgiving isn’t even here yet.  I know, it’s just not fair.  Thanksgiving deserves its fair share of attention, love, and devotion.  And I DO love Thanksgiving.  But once it’s here, I find myself in a vortex of busy-ness.  Christmas looms like a lion ready to attack.  I barely have time to get packages wrapped, much less decorate the tree.

In an effort to maintain my sanity (you know if momma ain’t happy…), we decorate before Thanksgiving so we are ready for the whirlwind ahead.  So, today is Christmas Tree Monday.  This evening, after pulling all my hair out getting through the school day, we will decorate our tree.  Complete with homemade hot chocolate and Christmas music.  After my road trip last week with my church lady friends, I feel less than adequate at decorating a tree.  But I thought if I were to post a before pic of this pitiful tree, it would make my finished tree look like a masterpiece.  It’s a tall, skinny tree because we have lots of bodies, lots of furniture, and we don’t have room for lots of tree. We are calling it the Leaning Tower of Tree.  For now.  Tomorrow it will be a work of art.  Um, kind of.  Sort of.  Beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all.

Leaning Tower of Tree

For all of you humbugs out there, don’t worry.  We will still add to our ‘Give Thanks’ board tonight.  Thanksgiving and Christmas all rolled up together.  If we don’t kill each other first.  Decorating the tree can get crazy around here with a bunch of boys.  Let’s just say, ornaments get broken when they are used as hand grenades.  You just don’t decorate the tree barefoot.

Thanks, Bernie.  At least I have one for each foot…even if they don’t match!

So you see, Monday HAS to be a fun day.  I can’t have it any other way.  I WON’T have it any other way!  It’s time to get my Monday face on!  Smiles all day.  Happy Monday, Funday, ya’ll!!

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Posted by on November 14, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Random Ramblings of Randomness


What a day!  My mind is simply too exhausted to actually focus on a specific topic for a post, so ramblings is what you get.  Consider yourself warned!!

♦  I have managed to work my poor little self to the bone today cleaning house and doing laundry.  I organized the homeschool room, washed a few windows, all the normal cleaning…. a busy girl, I was!  I was truly productive!  Go me!  But, now, I’m completely worn out and supper still needs to be cooked.  Plus, Bernie has played outside most of the day, which means he needs a bath.   The van still needs to be washed.  I really DID work all day, but is sure doesn’t sound like it with the list of things I still need to do.  :-/

♦  Since I have spent the day working so hard, I really think I deserve a pedicure.  Too bad my budget doesn’t agree.   Double :-/

♦  When you desperately need Calgon to take you away, but you’re out………Doggy Shampoo will work just fine.  Yes, I KNOW this.  I’m sure human shampoo would work great too, but I was so tired I just grabbed.  It was Bernie’s puppy shampoo.   I wasn’t ABOUT to empty out that garden tub full of suds….besides, I had already soaked for 20 minutes or so before I finally figured out why the scent was different, but familiar.

♦  That reminds me….. Bernie STILL needs a bath.  I should have saved my bath water and dunked him in.  That would save on shampoo AND water!  Of course, it would also be really gross.  But then again, I did soak for a half hour in puppy suds.  I have a pretty high gross tolerance.  Having kids will do that to you, especially boys.

♦  That brings back memories of the stomach virus from H-E-double hockey sticks.  That should probably be saved for another post.  All I will say is loft bed.  Train table.  Puke travels.

♦  Special K cracker chips taste a LOT like Baked Lays….with even fewer fat and calories per serving.  I heart them.  I already heart their new cereal….now if they will just create a healthy chocolate, maybe I can actually stay on my ‘healthy eating plan’.  HEP is really just a fancy shmancy phrase for a you-know-what, but I’m trying to play mind games and fool myself into sticking to the big D word…Shhhh…. don’t say anything.

♦  Speaking of food, since I am too tired to cook, I just ordered hamburgers and fried boudain for supper.  In my defense, the closest thing without driving to another town is Dairy Queen or the local greeezyy spoon.  I’ve always liked grease.  Hence the need for the HEP….

♦  Ever since thinking about Rob Lowe the other night, I have been on a quest to identify the world’s hottest man.  Oddly enough, all I can think of are famous men that are a complete turnoff.  It’s like I have to weed out all the losers in my mind before getting to the good ones.  And I’m thinking if I have to look them up on Google, they didn’t make much of an impression and aren’t worthy.  So far, all that have made the HOT list (other than Rob, obviously) is John McCain, Sam on Private Practice, McDreamy,  and possibly Frank from Everybody Loves Raymond.  Frank (aka Peter Boyle) is really not THAT hot, but I love a man that makes me laugh. Plus, he is kind of, well, um…… dead.  So I’m not sure if he should count.

♦ Bananas and Fritos are the bomb diggity….a treat my Granny introduced me to.  Don’t knock it til you try it.

♦Food is a recurring theme here tonight.  I think I’m hungry.

♦  My eleven year old just informed me that he wants to be like Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory.  He is currently re-organizing his room as he aspires to reach Sheldon’s level of organizational awesomeness.  Considering he has a few (to put it lightly) OCD tendencies pre-Sheldon influence,  this worries me.  On the other hand, maybe his organizing obsession will spill over into the rest of the house.   He could stay busy for years right here at home.

♦  And last, but most important, you gotta love a man who brings home the boudain.  So I think I’ll get off the computer and spend some time with the family.  There’s nothing like snuggling up on the couch with kids fresh out of the bath tub.  Which reminds me, I better go put the puppy shampoo up.  If my heathens figure out what I did, they’ll never let me forget it!!

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Posted by on November 5, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Potential Productive Power!

Potential Productive Power!

 

Productivity.

It’s a big word.  Yes, indeedy.

The definition of productivity:  the quality of being productive.

That REALLY helps.  Don’t you just love definitions that use the word to define itself?

Ok, the definition of productive:  capable of producing; yielding favorable or useful results, constructive.

After reading about how to be more productive through a featured blog on Freshly Pressed…..I felt it was time to re-evaluate my own productivity.  I should compare the tips and tricks found in the article to my own life and see what I need to change.  After all, who doesn’t want to be more productive?

It was a total and complete confidence crusher. Putting myself next to this super woman just made me feel like a big fat failure.  And why should I compare myself to others anyway?  I’m awesome just the way I am.  Right?

Since today is Friday, I am determined to feel totally confident, productive, and useful….whether it’s true or not.

With that being said, I have come up with some conclusions and tips regarding my own productivity.  I just know folks will be clamoring to get their hands on these useful tips and put them to work in their own lives.  And be warned…….it’s all good.  Positive.  Uplifting.  Encouraging.  All, in honor of Friday.  Cause who needs a Debbie Downer on Friday??

  • I set my alarm clock two hours before time for me to get up.  This way, when the alarm goes off, I can hit that snooze button over and over and over and over and over again.  When I do get up, I feel like I’ve accomplished sleeping late.  Already, a win for me.  Extra sleep!!  Woohoo!

  • Not only have I been seriously productive in GAINING an extra two hours of sleep, I also am impressed with a bit of urgency.  Who wouldn’t after hitting the snooze for two hours?  This in turn, causes me to rush through my shower and getting dressed because I’ve completely exhausted any extra time I might have had if I hadn’t had all that extra sleep.  Rushing saves time……more time saved…..  Productivity WIN!

 

  • I drink a minimum of three cups of coffee and swallow a handful of B12 first thing in the morning.  This gives me an added boost of energy to combat my early morning grumps and gives me the appropriate amount of shakes to help me avoid the desire to sit on the couch.  After all, wearing lounge wear  half the day is very relaxing.  Ok.  Lounge wear is just code for PJ pants.  But doesn’t lounge wear sound so much more professional rolling off the tongue?

  • Make a To-Do List of all the things you need to accomplish.  I’m a list lover.  So I really get into this one.  Grocery list.  Honey Do list.  Cleaning list.  Spring cleaning list.  Christmas list.  Wish list.  Bucket List.  By the time I finish making these lists and look them over, I am absolutely amazed I was able to fight my ADHD long enough to complete them.  Talk about a feeling of accomplishment!!

  • The TV must stay off!!
  • But, in the event of an emergency, just in case I have a weak moment,  I flip Netflix to a TV series that I am in no way interested in.  And I play each episode.  That way my non-interest can last all day long. If I just happen to fall into the grips of it’s addictive prowess, I have accomplished watching an entire season by days end.  Now THAT’S productivity!!
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  • To achieve maximum productive potential for the day, walk away from the laptop.
  • But, again, just in case of emergency…… place the laptop in your lap.  Just hear me out.  Sure you could waste time scrolling through the newsfeed on Facebook….refreshing every couple of minutes for the latest status updates.  Such a misuse of your time.  And time is precious. I will let you in on my secret, because you are here.  Reading my blog.  Making me feel even more productive.  So I owe you.  It’s a precious, valuable secret.  Open multiple pages in your browser window.  Facebook on one, Pinterest on another.  Don’t forget YouTube.  Oh, and don’t forget your email.  While waiting for pages to refresh, bounce back and forth between them all.  This completely maximizes your online potential, makes you feel really busy, and truly a productive and useful member of society.

Now, it will take a LOT of practice.  Don’t feel discouraged.  You CAN do this.  Productivity can be your middle name.  Practice makes perfect.  That’s what some old lady told me once.  So practice these tips and tricks.  Once you get them down, you will be ready for the big Kahuna.

What’s the big Kahuna, you ask?  Well, since it’s Friday, and because I completely reek of awesomeness, I am happy to share.  But it’s our little secret.  Ok?

To seriously achieve the BE ALL,  END ALL of productiveness……..

put the laptop into your lap…..

manage multiple windows…….

WHILE watching Netflix……

in your pajamas……

while drinking a tall cup of coffee……

and keep that To-Do List next to you with a pen handy.

That’s true PRODUCTIVITY POWER, right there!

After all, those stinkin’ lists just keep growing for some reason.

I thought about trying to figure that one out, but I’m too busy productively being productive.

 

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Posted by on November 4, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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My Time in the Pen……Well, Almost!


I should have known something was bound to happen.  After all, who actually drives two hours, into the next state, to go to a decent Christian bookstore?  I also needed to go to a teacher supply store, but there is one of those closer to my home in the boondocks.  I realized I must be half crazy to do this, but I was determined.

As I headed out of our small town, for some strange reason I looked down toward the corner of the windshield that houses the registration and inspection sticker on my car….. only to realize they were both expired.  And not JUST expired by a day or two….but a whole month.  A slither of sanity trickled into my mind for a moment, but really…..would you rather make a trip to the courthouse or a large town that actually has a Chick-fil-A??  They have the best cole slaw.  And waffle fries?  YUM.  If you are really hanging on my every word (as you should be) you remember I said I only had a MOMENT of sanity.  So obviously, I chose Chick-fil-A.  Duh.

The munchkin tagged along with me today.  Just he and I.  Me and him.  Him and me.  Not sure which is correct, so that should cover it.  Did I tell you ADHD has a strong presence in my mind today?

Anyway, as we enter a small town about 30 miles up the highway, I say a quick prayer.  It’s not like me to drive illegal, much less drive to another state illegal.  I was being a daredevil today.  A rebel.  So a tad bit of worry crept in.  Of course, there was also the parking ticket fiasco hovering over head.

Years ago… more than 5….I received a parking ticket that was ‘given’ to me via a camera from downtown Dallas, Tx.  I live about 5 hours from downtown Dallas.  I was at work that day here in my hometown.  For months I tried to call and get this misunderstanding ‘fixed’….with no luck.  The number was for an automated system with no human in sight.  After trying to get a human at least once a week for a few months, I gave up.  I refused to pay a ticket that did not belong to me. And besides, I’m a daredevil anyway, right??

However, the fear is always there.  In the back of my mind.  What if they put a warrant out for my arrest?  If I were to get stopped, would that pop up on my record check?  Could it be possible that my 10 year old would get to watch his Youth Director mom get hauled into jail??  Worry almost turned into a complete panic attack.

I began to plan for my arrest in my mind…….my mom was out of town, so she couldn’t come pick up the Munchkin when they were hauling me off.  The hubby was out of town for work.  I would have to call my Pastor and his wife.  What a scandal that would be.  The talk of the town.   I wondered if I should smile for my mug shot.  They are always the worst pictures!  Would they handcuff me in front of the baby boy?  I was suddenly an outlaw!  My breathing began to get labored, I could feel beads of sweat on my back……

I snapped out of my nightmare, prayed a quick prayer that I might be spared being hauled off to jail today, turned up the music, and starting jamming. After all, I’m a rebel.  A daredevil.  I’m living life on the wild side!!

I wonder....would I look THIS HOT in jail???????????

That’s when it happened.  As I topped the hill, I came face-to-face with a Texas DPS officer.  He pulled over on the shoulder, and I knew what was next.  At least God had given me some warning.  Some time to get a plan in my mind.  But how was I going to explain this to the Munchkin?  Life as I knew it was over.  I was a convict.  A felon.  I was gonna get to visit the pen.  In the famous words of Johnny Cash, I could hear the train-a-coming…….

Rebels and daredevils are only cool until they get caught.  Then they are just outlaws.

The dreaded lights began to flash.  I pulled over.  Feeling a bit pasty and clammy all at the same time, my hands were violently shaking and I was having trouble scrounging for my insurance card.  More charges to be filed against me.

The officer approached the car, gave the usual exchange………

“You were a bit over the speed limit.  And did you know you’re registration and inspection were out?”

What was I supposed to say?

“Yes, officer.  I realized that today.  But you know, Chick-fil-A is so darn good.  I thought I would go ahead and break the law instead….across two states.   You want me to pick you up a chicken sandwich or some waffle fries?  The waffle fries are to die for when you dip them in their Honey Roasted BBQ sauce.”

My mouth opened, but only a slight moan/whimper came out.

He must have realized I was about to go right on into post-traumatic stress syndrome and felt sorry for me.

He told me he was going to write me a warning for the speeding and a ticket for the registration, which would be removed upon registering my car.  Normally, this would be cause for great celebration.  Falling at his feet and vowing my allegiance to him for all eternity.

But the parking ticket fiasco was yet to be resolved.  The officer walked back to his car.

The rest was pretty much a blur.  I thought about calling my husband right then.  Just in case the officer wouldn’t let me make a call before patting me down.  But I was frozen.  Would they search me?  What underwear was I wearing?  Would they search my car?  It was a mess!

It truly seemed like an eternity, waiting for him to come back.  I debated jumping out of my minivan and throwing myself on the mercy of the court.  Or the State of Texas.  Whoever might help me.  I started to spew my explanation and that I was innocent until proven guilty.  I almost started bawling, fall to the ground, and beg for my freedom right there on the side of the highway.  My fate was in the hands of a state of Texas computer.

And then, as quick as it happened, it was over.

“Have a nice day.  Be careful.”

The sense of relief was unlike any emotion I have ever felt.  I immediately began screaming, “Thank you, Jesus!!!”  over and over again.  The Munchkin joined in my celebration.

I wasn’t sure what to do.  Should I turn around, drive home, and get myself legal?

I thought for a minute.  Then two.  I even called the hubby.  He is the responsible one, so you know what he said.

I know, you are all, just sitting on pins and needles in suspense, wondering……

Waffle fries from Chick-Fil-A, an American fas...

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All I will say is this…………those waffle fries were BETTER THAN EVER.

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Posted by on November 3, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Smiles, Snickers, and Snorts


There are things in life that bring a smile to your face.  No matter your mood, you just have to smile.

Then there are things that make you snicker, or even flat out give a good snort as you suffer from a belly laugh.

This list contains some of each.  You decide which.

♥  The way your dog acts when you first walk in the door.  Mine is in a pen, so he dances on two paws, trying his best  to jump over the sides so he can cover you in slobber…even though you’ve only been gone an hour.

♥  Finally getting to the restroom after you’ve held it on the road for the past hour and a half and you feel like eyeballs are swimming.

♥  Rob Lowe.  Seriously.  Yum.

♥  Watching your kids have a burping contest.  Or even better, you joining in…and winning.

♥  The fact that watching Sheldon on Big Bang Theory makes me feel normal.

♥  Finding anything at 75% off, whether you need it or not.

♥  Flipping your pillow over to the cool side.

♥  Your mom falling backwards in her recliner to the floor, jumping repeatedly, stripping her shirt off and screaming because she thinks her kid just threw a bug on her.  Her 5 boys rolling in the floor, literally laughing their rears off  at their mom doing a striptease in front of them while screaming for help…. all while slowly coming to the realization that the bug was actually a flying raisin.

♥ Maxine.

 

♥  Your dog crawling out from under the covers, laying on your pillow right next to your head, and passing gas on you.   True story.

♥  Your baby boy writing in his journal that momma’s kisses are the sweetest.

♥  The look on someone’s face when you randomly scare the living daylights out of them.  Try it.  And see if you don’t laugh.

♥  Taking off your bra at the end of a hard day.  Or any day, for that matter.

♥ That feeling you get on Friday afternoon when you realize, you have made it, you have survived.  The weekend is here.

♥ And last, but certainly not least…………

                                                                                                               Puppy Planking!!

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by on November 2, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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God Speaks


For a little more than a week now, I have been struggling with overload.  I have felt like I meet myself coming and going.  It never fails, when I am in the midst of overload, when I have so many things on my plate at once, I feel like I don’t do any one thing well.  Since doing things halfway is not in my nature, I stay completely frustrated at myself.  Partly for not living up to my own expectations.  Partly for allowing myself to become over-committed.  I feel like I do everything halfway.

Yesterday, I somehow managed to get a trip to town alone.  A rarity indeed.  I live in the sticks, so going to town is a 25 minute ride.  As I had this cherished alone time, I cranked up the tunes and sang worship songs to the King.  Something I needed desperately.  I needed to remind myself of what’s important.  Where my focus comes from.  Of course, the tears began to flow.  The emotions of the overwhelming tasks ahead, exhaustion, frustration, they overtook me and I began to spill my heart to God.

I quit my job last year to be able to focus more on my family, and especially a child with some special needs.  I KNEW, without a doubt, God had great things ahead for my family.  None of that had changed.  I still know this is true.  But, I have taken on too much.  It was clouding my vision of God’s goodness.  The commitments made were causing me to lose focus.

I am destined to follow God.  My heart longs to follow Him.

I tried to fight His calling on my life for a long time.  Several years, in fact.  I found every excuse NOT to do what I knew He was telling me.  What He was asking was hard.  It was scary.  I worked so hard to get through school.  I loved teaching.  How could He possibly ask me to give that up?  How could our family survive financially if I quit?

One of my favorite books is Anne of Green Gables.  She was a very dramatic girl and would often claim to be in the ‘depths of despair’.  Well, let me tell you.  I wasn’t listening to God.  I was doing my best to drown out His voice.  I was just sure He didn’t know, didn’t realize, what He was requiring of me was too much.  He wasn’t going to have it.  He kept pulling at my heart.  I couldn’t pray for my sick child without this nagging in my soul.  The more He pulled at my heart, the more I fought.

Amidst all this fighting, I found myself, over and over again, in the depths of despair.  I was literally heartsick.  I was constantly pulled between a job I once loved and my child who desperately needed my full time attention.   Things seemed to spiral out of control.  God has a way of getting your attention.  And He had mine.  Broken, full of heartache, finally, I said, “OK, God.  You lead, I will follow.”

I haven’t looked back.  My family has been just fine.  No my child is not past his health needs.  They are still very real.  Financially, well, we make it.  We have had to make adjustments, but all in all it’s a miracle.  God is faithful.  He honors those who honor Him.  No, my life is not easy.  But I am at peace.  Words cannot express the love and closeness I feel with God.   I can’t help but wonder, if I had not found myself in the ‘depths of despair’, would I have ever given in?  Would I have surrendered to Him?  Would I feel Him so near to me now?

Even with this incredible life-changing experience I had with God, I still found myself overwhelmed and in need of His love and comfort.  Once Again.  God spoke to me yesterday, in that car.  As if He were whispering in my ear.  As I spilled my heart out to Him, He was there.  Holding me.  Loving me.  Guiding me.  Whispering, “Follow me.”

Why do we so often busy ourselves up with things to distract us from our purpose in life?  I sometimes think I am my own worst enemy.  It’s as if, living a life in full surrender to Him, frightens me, so I busy myself up with distractions so I have a good excuse to stay where I am.  God never calls us to a life of stalemate.  He always will pull you farther.  I cannot even imagine the life He has ahead for me.  I don’t know what He will ask of me next.  What I do know, is now, I must give some things up.  I must keep my eyes on Him.  My purpose is to live a life for Him.  As tears ran down my cheek, I once again found myself saying, “Ok, God.  You lead, I will follow.”   Through tears and pain, I once again, felt Him closer than ever before.

And then, as if He was in charge of the DJ himself, the song, Blessings, came on.

Thank you, Lord.  Once again, you swooped in, and gave me just what I needed, just in time.  I am in awe of Your love for me.

Today, I am renewed, refreshed, and in love with Him all over again.

People say God doesn’t speak.  I beg to differ.  He speaks.  If you will only listen.

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Posted by on November 2, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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Psycho-Mom Strikes Again


I was out of town last week on an overnight trip.  Just a day.  Yet, when I walked in the door, the house smelled of this awful stench.  I’m talking cat pee + dirty feet + dog poopy + sour clothes + mildew stench.  As I opened the front door, I almost lost my breath.  It was sickening.  Disgusting.  Gross.  Turn your stomach.  Nasty.

Not only did I walk into a fumigated house, but I also walked into a kitchen piled high with        dirty dishes.  I’m not even sure there were any clean dishes left.  The floor was there somewhere……..under all the clutter.  Every bed sheet appeared to be strewn through the living room floor.  I think they were having a little camp-out.  Right there in the living room.

That day, I found out just how quickly I can cross over.  You know, to that other personality.  That insane, psycho mom who opens her mouth only to have a few other heads dart from her throat….all with sharp tongues of steel.  I just know if someone had taken a picture of me at that very moment, I would have steam flowing from every body cavity I have.  Maybe even fire coming from my mouth.

No explanations were necessary.  I knew  EXACTLY what had taken place here.  While the kiddies were having their play party, they neglected to take Bernie out.  On top of that, Bernie had determined to throw himself one royal puppy fit.  He had marked his territory all over my area rugs. I couldn’t see it, but it had to be there.  What else could cause such a nasty smell?

The stench was so bad, it gave me a headache.  I immediately started ripping up carpets, bleaching floors underneath.  Bleaching everything. Cleaning the carpets.  All to no avail.

This is me.  Only I’m older.  And more wrinkled.   And waaay more ticked off!

But the stench remained.  I was furious.  Humans nor animals were safe in my presence.  I was a mad hatter and ready to attack.

This went on for a couple of days.  Our schedules were so incredibly busy, I didn’t have time to just totally spring clean, so I did my best by holding my breath as much as I could.  I felt like the stench was seeping into the pores of my skin.

Finally, on day three, I could take no more.  I began, once again, tearing the house apart.  I left no floor untouched.  I completely removed the area rugs.  Still pewtred stench hovered in the house.

I refused to pet the puppy.  He was banished from the couch.  I gave the kids double chores.  Trying my best to make the little turkeys learn a lesson and never forget to watch the dog again.

I was standing in the kitchen, talking to my hubby, when I kept getting a strong whiff of odor.  I turned around.  There was nothing there but the vacuum cleaner filter.  It couldn’t be.  Could it??

I have one of those bagless vacuums.  Mine has a removable filter, as well as a built in filter.  Before leaving for Houston, I washed out both, and put them in the drainer to dry.  I have always cleaned the removable filter, but the built in, only the one time.  It had gotten so nasty, something had to be done.  So I tried washing it with soap and water.

BIG MISTAKE.

I picked up the vacuum canister and as it got closer to my nose, I almost hurled.  The culprit had been found.  I threw the canister out the back door.  Grabbed a can of Febreeze, and went to work.  Within minutes, literally, the obnoxious odor was gone.  As if it were never there.

As much as I wanted to sing and dance, jump for joy, pet my dog, and hug my kids, I couldn’t.  The guilt hung in the air like the densest of smoke.  The looks on their faces were priceless.  The only saving grace, was they still neglected their chores in my absence and  made a huge mess of the house.  I wasn’t off the hook, but neither were they.  Apologies were made.

We decided to call a truce.  Bernie was pulled back into the fold.  I’m sure I’ve utterly confused him.  He is now, as I type laying on the couch.

Psycho mom, and her extra heads, have left the building.

For now.

 

 

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Posted by on October 31, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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