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Halloween Haunts…..


 

Halloween is haunting me.

And not in a creepy, who’s gonna jump out of the bushes and get me kinda way.

I have children.  LOTS of children.  Five boys to be exact.  Two are on their own and at college, but three are still here.

Needless to say, taking care of so many children can be expensive.  And this past year, I resigned from my teaching position to stay home and care for my brood.  Saying we are on a budget is a MAJOR understatement!

What does all of this have to do with Halloween haunting me??

We are trying to costume up on a budget.  A tight budget.

Most boys would be happy throwing on some camouflage clothes, grabbing a plastic rifle, painting their face and going as hunters.  Or even wearing their baseball uniform from baseball season.  But not MY boys.  NO.

 

 

My boys want to be the Joker, the Riddler, and the Penguin….all Batman characters.  But not just any Joker, Riddler, and Penguin.  That would be too easy.  They want to be those characters from specific Batman movies.  Yay.

This puts me on a quest from H-E-double hockey sticks.

And an exciting quest it is.  In fact, I feel like Indiana Jones on the quest for the Holy Grail.

 

Just for the record, there isn’t a purple suit jacket within a hundred miles of my small town.  I know.  I have looked. I have worried about this jacket.  I have sat up at night trying to figure out a way to create this jacket (without having to use the sewing skills I DON’T have).  I have prayed for this jacket to appear.  Sadly, that is only ONE of the items I am STILL scrounging to find with absolutely NO LUCK.

So, while all of you are out bobbing apples, carving pumpkins, and drinking hot apple cider, think about me in Halloween Hell.

I will be scrambling to put together a Riddler cane, dying a suit jacket purple, cutting out question marks to go on another suit jacket, trying to figure out a way to make a monacle for the Penguin…..all while my blood pressure turns my face into a nice pumpkin red-orange, I pull the hairs out of my head a hand full at a time, and the stress creates a bleeding ulcer that is oozing out of my ears.

At least that’s one costume taken care of.  I’ll just go as the deranged, psycho- mom I will be!

 

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Posted by on October 24, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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A Day in the Life


Cover of "The Godfather (Widescreen Editi...

Cover of The Godfather (Widescreen Edition)

Lessons learned and reflections on another chaotic day in my life…..

  • French wine is not feminine, but French men are…..That is, according to the world of Cameron, my 15 yr old son.  Of course , other bits of trivia (according to Cameron) are:  Canadians are evil,  Garfield is a hero and should be given a Nobel Peace Prize,  all of life’s important lessons can be learned from The Godfather.
  • Speaking of Cam, he actually CAN only converse through impersonations for an entire DAY.  True story.
  • How to simplify fractions and how to balance equations containing fractions.  YUCK and YUCK.
  • Miserable people are like cancer.  They seek to destroy and kill all happiness surrounding them.  It makes me want to give said miserable person an atomic wedgie, a couple of good wet willies, and shoot spit balls at them while singing “Na-nanny boo, boo!” at the top of my lungs until they promised to play nice.
  • My electric bill is WAY too high.
  • The TV show, Lost, is only good for blood pressure spikes due to the insane suspense that NEVER reaches its climax.  Geeeeezzzz, enough already.  I’m on episode 39 and we are still in a constant state of anticipation.
  • Perfume just can’t cover up stink.  Enuff said.

  • God’s mercies ARE new every morning.  God’s grace, God’s forgiveness, God’s love for me is more than sufficient.  Thank you, Lord.
  •  Lettuce is really tasty.  I have decided taste factor is in direct relation to  hunger factor.  Since D.I.E.T is currently in my vocabulary as opposed to chocolate, lettuce is very tasty.
  • Although Halloween is rapidly approaching, there is not a purple wig to be found within a good 100 mile radius of my home.  Yay.
  • My van can actually drive at least another 13 miles after reaching the “Zero miles to empty” warning light.

  • I believe there are actually Laundry Trolls who live in my walls, come out at night, yank perfectly clean clothes out of dressers, and dirty them up as only Laundry Trolls (or little boys) can do.  It multiplies by the hamper full faster than my washing machine can churn.

That being said, I need to go throw on a load of clothes in the hopes that we might actually have clean clothes for church in the morning…..That is….. if we make it to church before finding out just how many miles we have left until actually running out of gas.  I forgot to run by and remedy that situation this evening.  Like I said, A day in the life……….of the Chaos Queen!

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Posted by on October 22, 2011 in It's my life.....

 

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